Devil Dog Daily News, Evening Edition

Thank you Veterans

2011-11-11T11:11:00.010-06:00

Thank you all who have served.

Let us not forget those who died to protect our country and our way of life.

11/11/11

2011-11-11T11:11:00.009-06:00

To echo the post from 1/11/11 today's date means NOTHING. Its 11-11-2011 not 11BC or 11AD.

11-11-11= -11

So today is minus eleven or negative eleven if you please.

Today is Veteran's Day. And if you want to play the numbers in dates and time game remember this:

Major hostilities of World War I were formally ended at the 11th hour of the 11th day of the 11th month of 1918 with the German signing of the Armistice. If you want to mark today, mark it by thanking a veteran for all that you hold dear. Strike that, how about you thank 11 veterans, now that would be symbolic.

Just so you can head off any more silliness for 10-11-12, that is my birthday, and trust me when I say nothing special happened on that day either.

Nigel Tufnel Day

2011-11-11T11:00:00.000-06:00

Happy Nigel Tufnel Day!

Yes, the day when everything goes up to 11 - it's November 11, 2011 or, put another way, 11/11/11.

Everything up to 11! Nigel Tufnel, guitarist for the band Spinal Tap is the comic creation of Christopher Guest. The movie This Is Spinal Tap introduced Tufnel and Tap to the world.

A deft satire of so many of the worst qualities in lead guitarists, Tufnel certainly looks as though he was modelled on Jeff Beck but has backstage green-room requirements that, er, riff on Eddie Van Halen's infamous difficulty. Like so many heavy-metal players he is fond of classical music, even mixing Bach and Mozart to make his own "Mach" piece - a beautiful piano instrumental called Lick My Love Pump.

Tufnel is a scene-stealer in This Is Spinal Tap. He has a guitar that still has the price-tag on - to show it's in mint condition. "Don't touch it, don't even look at it!" he warns the film's director, Marty DiBergi. There's another guitar with beautiful sustain; he even attempts to demonstrate. DiBergi points out that he can't hear anything. "You would, if it were playing," Tufnel explains.

"....but these go to eleven..." Classic.

Happy Birthday Marines

2011-11-10T02:36:00.000-06:00

236 years of honor, courage and commitment.

To all who wear the eagle, globe and anchor today and to those proudly wore it in years before,

Happy Birthday Marines.

Sleep well citizens,

somewhere a Marine stands guard

to guarantee you wake up free.

Smarties

2011-11-03T05:55:00.000-05:00

Smarties are made in Canada. They are also made in New Jersey. I'm not sure if New Jersey is in the United States but I'll probably look it up later. The Smarties I am describing are the wafer candy variety. Do not confuse them with the Smarties made by Nestle'. Those are not Smarties but imitation M&M's as they are hard candy coated chocolate. For you candy Nazis out there, I don't care which came first....I've never so much as seen the chocolate type of Smarties so M&M's are the real kings of candy coated chocolate so suck it. You can click on the picture of the addictive little bastards and read the Wikipedia article. You won't find any empirical research in the article. Hell, you aren't going to find any in this article either but I thought I'd share that fact with you.

I've been eating the addictive little bastards for a little over a month for an afternoon snack. One of our consultants has been buying them and stocking the candy bowl. I generally have 3 packages each day. I've made some observations, here they are...

Two weeks ago it seemed there was a shortage of green Smarties. It was noted that there were generally only a single green Smartie in each package if the green Smarties were not completely absent.

There are fifteen individual candy wafers in each pack if we are talking about the standard Hallowe'en variety. There are six flavors.

If you eat them systematically, meaning, match them up by color and eat two at a time you will start noticing some patterns.

Approximately 95 percent of the time after matching up the Smarties you will come up with 3 unmatched Smarties. You are required to eat them all together.

Approximately 4 percent of the time you will have five unmatched Smarties. You are required to eat them together.

Approximately 1 percent of the time you will have a single Smartie left over. I generally wait for another package to be opened and eat the single Smartie with a mate from the next package.

I have yet to encounter a situation where 6 unmatched Smarties remained. I'm sure you could do the probability math and come up with the chances of that happening....I can't.

You may have noticed I said approximately because I did not document any of these findings. Therefore they are probably not findings at all but perhaps more accurately described as observations.

I hope you enjoy Smarties as much as I do and have enjoyed this little exercise in observance. Buy a bag and let me know if your observations match my own.

Post Note: Just as I completed this article my package ended in a single Smartie and guess what...it was green. Go figure.

Happy Halloween

2011-10-31T07:26:00.000-05:00

I love it when I find a lost 20$ bill in a pair of jeans

2011-10-27T07:30:00.000-05:00

By Senior National Security Producer Charley KeyesThe mystery of $6 billion that seemed to go missing in the early days of the Iraq war has been resolved, according to a new report.New evidence shows most of that money, $6.6 billion, did not go astray in that chaotic period, but ended up where it was supposed to be, under the control of the Iraqi government, according to a report from the office of the Special Inspector General for Iraq Reconstruction or SIGIR.

The official accounting had used more bland language. "SIGIR concluded that weaknesses in DoD's financial and management controls left it unable to properly account for and articulate the disposition of remaining DFI (Development Fund for Iraq) funds," a 2010 report said.

So the army couldn't find the money?...is that really a big surprise? I think you would be surprised at what gets lost in times of war. According to my buddy they used ridiculous amounts of resources to pick up destroyed trucks and equipment...just to account for it. While other things went missing, were later located, and then not returned. Go figure, it's the military, is anyone surprised?

Sounds like the Army kept a small slush fund from the 6.6 billion (217 million-ish) to pay for "stuff". I hope the buggers aren't bitching. We spent a ton of money to free those people and nation build. It would be like me complaining that a random person on the street that promised me 20$, never gave it to me.

Ball Camera, very cool

2011-10-21T07:50:00.001-05:00

Perhaps the coolest thing I've seen in a really....really long time. Where do I get one?

Sadness

2011-10-21T07:10:00.000-05:00

Superior Discount Liquor had an unexpected and dramatic inventory reduction earlier this year when a shelf running the length of the store gave way, sending 6,810 bottles of wine and champagne hurtling to the floor. The collapse flooded the store and sent two nearby workers scurrying out of the way.

Hard Times in Virginia

2011-10-18T12:50:00.000-05:00

"I had something to say, but I don't remember what it was."

In an ironic twist, President Obama's Teleprompter had an unscripted moment when it was apparently stolen along with a stash of other audio equipment inside a truck awaiting the president's arrival in Virginia.
The Defense Information System Agency on Tuesday confirmed the theft of the truck, which was later recovered, but said no sensitive information was lost.

The truck was stolen in Henrico County outside Richmond. It was stationed there in advance of a presidential visit on Wednesday, while the president started his bus tour in North Carolina.

There must be some serious hard times in Virginia when government agency trucks used by the President to get reelected are stolen. I just imagine the guys who looked inside and figured out they just stole something from the President of the United States. I'll bet they stay in hiding for a few months.

What is it with riding horses on roads after dark?

2011-10-13T10:57:00.004-05:00

BROKEN ARROW, Oklahoma -- Broken Arrow Police say a horse was killed after a pickup truck hits it and its rider early Thursday morning.

Police say shortly after midnight, Michael Wick, 20, of Broken Arrow was riding a horse westbound on New Orleans just east of 177th East Avenue when the pickup truck struck the horse.

Once again we have a horse back rider hit by a vehicle AFTER DARK. This time it is in Northeastern Oklahoma. I'm thinking at this point there will be legislation introduced to require lights on horses in the next session of the legislature. No, I'm serious, I can almost guarantee you someone is writing the bill AS I TYPE THIS.

Thank you dumbasses, you just made riding a horse after dark more expensive. You will also see a rash of tickets for horse riders who do not comply. Because you are too stupid to take care of yourself, The Nanny State has to do it for you. You only have yourselves to blame.

Only in Oklahoma

2011-10-11T05:55:00.000-05:00

CRAIG COUNTY, Oklahoma – A Welch, Oklahoma man riding a horse was injured after a car struck the horse in Craig County Saturday night. The Oklahoma Highway Patrol reported.This happened at 8:25 p.m. on Highway 10, approximately one and half miles west of Welch. Troopers said 21-year-old Abraham Vontreger was transported by Eagle Med to Freeman Hospital in Joplin, where he was admitted in stable condition with arm and trunk internal injuries.

Seriously? Riding a horse on the highway? This was, as you will notice, AFTER DARK. Did he have lights on that horse, reflective tape? I'll bet no.Zoom down to the Google Street View of 1.5 miles west of Welch, Oklahoma.

View Larger Map

Not a whole lot out there...but none-the-less you shouldn't be riding a horse on the highway. He's lucky to have survived. I'll bet the horse didn't.

When I was in United States Marine Corps boot camp a recruit from The Bronx, New York City asked me "do you still ride horses" and if the "indians were much trouble out there?" I told him we don't ride horses any more and yeah "we indians" are still a lot of trouble. He was serious too.

Good fun!

2011-10-10T08:50:00.000-05:00

NEWRY — Rocco Andreozzi and partner Kim Wasko expected the competition to be tough, but knowing their adversaries may have improved their odds.

Andreozzi and Wasko of Bethel took first place at Sunday River's 12th annual North American Wife Carrying Championship at Sunday River Ski Resort on Saturday. They finished the final run with a time of 49.64 seconds, shaving off 12.27 seconds from their winning time last year.

Andreozzi and Wasko received a check for $620 and nine cases of beer.

Good clean fun.

Steve Jobs, NExT founder, dead, cancer, 57

2011-10-05T18:56:00.000-05:00

Steve Jobs is dead. I remember when the first Apple computers came out. The revolution had begun.

Apple with Steve Jobs at the head, was revolutionary. Apple went after the educational market and have been there ever since. With a proprietary operating system their computers pioneered the music and graphics industry.They had some misses, NExT among them, but they always seemed to reinvent themselves. Steve Jobs was often the reason for that innovation.

Mom Sells Baby for 15k$, editor should be fired

2011-10-05T07:20:00.001-05:00

While this story is quite disturbing, the fact that this article wasn't proof read, disturbs me more.

I think they are trying to tell us that...

"Wismer and Gavaghan are both charged with Dealing in Children and Conspiracy in the Second Degree."

...because they repeat it twice in the article.

I'm pretty sure Iris Phillips thought the baby should have "been given to her sister OR someone". But that doesn't really help either because SHE DID GIVE IT TO SOMEONE, she just collected 15k$ for it.

At this point you should be afraid...very afraid for the future of this country. We seem to be getting stupider and stupider and stupider.

The story...

A new mom is in hot water after selling her newborn son for $15,000 so she could take her other two sons on a trip to Disney World, according to court documents.

Bridget Wismer, 33, was arrested at her home in New Castle, Del. after she and the alleged baby buyer, John Gavaghan, 54, of Philadelphia, were caught on a surveillance camera taking care of the last bit of paperwork, according to New Castle County detectives.

Bears Do Not Make Good House Guests

2011-10-04T05:55:00.000-05:00

NEWPORT, Pa. – Officials say a bear attacked a couple inside their central Pennsylvania home, sending both people to a hospital.

Pennsylvania Game Commission spokesman Jerry Feaser says the attack happened Monday morning in Oliver Township. He says the couple's dog was outside and ran into the home, followed by the bear.

Gee thanks Fido for bringing home the bear. This is why everyone should be required to own a gun.

U.S. - US Michigan Girl Kicks Winning Field Goal After Being Named Homecoming Queen

2011-10-03T09:09:00.002-05:00

PINCKNEY, Mich. – A Michigan girl is wowing classmates on and off the field at her high school.Brianna Amat, the first female to play on Pinckney High School's varsity football team, kicked a 31-yard game-winning field goal on Friday and was crowned homecoming queen during the game, MyFOXDetroit.com reports.

How awesome is that? That's a story you don't normally see. Good luck to you at Western Michigan.

Self-serve bagging lanes on the way out

2011-09-28T05:55:00.000-05:00

MANCHESTER, Conn. – When Keith Wearne goes grocery shopping, checking out with a cashier is worth the few extra moments, rather than risking that a self-serve machine might go awry and delay him even more.Most shoppers side with Wearne, studies show. And with that in mind, some grocery store chains nationwide are bagging the do-it-yourself option, once considered the wave of the future, in the name of customer service.

This article could read when Eric Stephens goes grocery shopping...I can't stand self-checkout. There are several problems with it. My favorite is getting stuck behind some person that isn't smart enough to USE the self checkout lane. I'm pretty sure most checkers are cut from the same cloth.

I know some kids at my local grocery store that check. They are not typical checkers. They are just taking advantage of the pay structure of their workplace and getting themselves promoted to the higher paying jobs. They won't be checkers their entire lives.

But those, and you know which ones I'm talking about, that are checkers, and that's all they will be or want to be. Of my top two reasons not to shop at Wal-Mart the first of which being nearly everything in the store is produced in China, the second is the check out. You can't get out of the damn place. I've stood in line for 25 minutes holding two items at a Wal-Mart. I won't even comment about shopping at a Wal-Mart on the 1st or 15th of the month you can only imagine what I'd write about that.

If they wanted to improve the check out at stores make the checker's pay based on the ITEMS PER HOUR SCANNED. Yeah, I bet they would have you out of there in a freakin' heartbeat if it paid better.In any event, if you are too stupid to check yourself out, don't go through those lanes. I would say at 1 in 4 times I use the self checkout the machine malfunctions. Like a recent visit to Lowe's when I scanned the second of my three items the machine just froze...locked completely up. And since there isn't a keyboard or any way to interact with the register except the touch screen when that's gone you.are.done.

So it seems the retailers are seeing the bigger picture and are deciding that the shrinkage (people stealing) that occurs at the self check and the customer complaints aren't worth the effort. They are going to rely on the second thing stores today are crappy at, customer service from the register staff. Good luck with that. When you have to train a person to say nice things and engage the customer at the register YOU ARE DOOMED as a society.

Common sense seems to be lacking

2011-09-27T05:55:00.000-05:00

In the age of instant tweets and impulsive Facebook posts, some companies are still trying to figure out how they can limit what their employees say about work online without running afoul of the law.Confusion about what workers can or can't post has led to a surge of more than 100 complaints at the National Labor Relations Board -- most within the past year -- and created uncertainty for businesses about how far their social media policies can go."Employers are struggling to figure out what the right policies are and what they should do when these cases arise," said Michael Eastman, labor law policy director at the U.S. Chamber of Commerce.

As we watch common sense slowly slip away, I felt it necessary to share a couple of old sayings that clearly define what you should and should not do in regards to your employment. Kids today need to hear these words and learn to live by them.

"Don't bite the hand that feeds you."This phrase totally makes sense. But if you've never owned a pet or perhaps ever read a book this might not be completely clear. This phrase has been around for over a hundred years. It the title of a popular song in 1915.

"Don't shit where you eat."I'm pretty sure this is common sense everyone should know. Perhaps not. The vulgarity of the phrase tells the reader it is a disgusting habit. The armies of the Civil War had to be told to put the kitchens UP STREAM of where you water and keep the horses. The phraseology of this may be crude and lend itself to a late 20th century reference but the common sense of not defecating near where you prepare or even eat food should make sense to most people.

This phrase is used most to describe the behavior of dating or sleeping with your co-workers. This is another problem with kids today, they don't know how to control the drama in their lives. If they don't date or sleep with their co-workers there will never be sexual tension at work and therefore at least one less kind of drama to deal with when you are trying to earn a living.

All of this as you might expect is subject to the environment where you live. Be thankful you don't live in Mexico. They seem to have harsher penalties for posting on the web.

Top 10 Scientific Discoveries of 2010 by ZIDBITS

2011-09-26T07:28:00.000-05:00

The list contains some space stuff, some new life stuff, anti-matter trapped in a lab, and a possible new element (117) or maybe not. You can read about it if you follow the link.

Well played sir

2011-09-23T07:28:00.002-05:00

Josh Ripley didn't have to stop. Running in a recent cross country meet for Andover (Minn.) High, the junior varsity runner was making his way through the trail at the Applejack Invite when he heard a loud scream during the first mile of a two-mile race. Most of the other kids running didn't pay much attention to Lakeville South runner Mark Paulauskas, who was writhing in pain at the time, as they passed by.

Well done young man. Sportsmanship at its finest. My hat is off to you.

Deodorant? Yes please

2011-09-20T05:55:00.000-05:00

If there’s an unpleasant pong in the room or on the train as you read this, chances are it’s a chap to blame.A survey suggests that, despite the growth of all manner of male grooming products, one in five men admits to never using deodorant or any other kind of body spray.The same proportion – perhaps the very same people – say they don’t ever wash their hair with shampoo, while three out of ten reject shower gel.

I am in the three of ten who reject shower gel. Shower gel is STUPID. Yeah, I said it. A bar of soap in my shower used by two people lasts at least a week and costs about 1$(US). Shower gel costs about 3$(US) and lasts perhaps two weeks for one person using it (my son). So it is cheaper to use soap and it is much more convenient. I have used gel, and the number of times I have put it in my hand and then it slipped out on to the floor before hitting my body is too high to count. Thus it has been deemed an INEFFICIENT cleaning product.

And for those of you that don't have the pleasure of being near me every day I use Old Spice and only use after shave if I am going out on a date with my lady.

I know somewhere half way across the world Sally is saying, "Thank.You.Eric."

You're welcome Sally.

And this one is for Sally's special man...You're welcome Steve.

You both are missed. Aloha.

Arrrrr

2011-09-19T06:58:00.002-05:00

Happy International Talk Like a Pirate Day!

5 Pirates You Should Know via Art of Manliness.com

This guy needs a drug test

2011-09-16T17:53:00.000-05:00

Seriously? I would think that cop would be executing a field sobriety test on this guy.

Invisible 'Chameleon' Tank Finally Revealed at World's Largest Weapons Fair

2011-09-15T05:55:00.000-05:00

Adaptiv -- an armor encasing that looks and feels as one imagines a dragon's scales to -- turns tanks into chameleons, allowing them to disappear into the environment behind them or to even look like a snow drift, trash can, crowd, or a soccer mom’s station wagon.I'm calling bullshit on this one.

First should we REALLY be using the word INVISIBLE? I mean its INVISIBLE if you are looking at it with infrared goggles. But to the naked eye it's still visible.

Soccer mom's station wagon? Soccer moms don't drive station wagons...they drive Range Rovers, duh.

Good thing that dude is pointing at it in the new story's photo, otherwise I would have mistaken it for that big tank sitting there.

Milpundit: Tribal Wisdom of the Dakota Indians

2011-09-13T07:16:00.001-05:00

Milpundit: Tribal Wisdom of the Dakota Indians: The tribal wisdom of the Dakota Indians, passed on from generation to generation, says that, "When you discover that you are riding a dead ...

Genius.

US regulators remove two acne medical apps

2011-09-12T05:55:00.000-05:00

In a watershed moment, the FTC this week fined two app developers who falsely advertised that their smartphone apps could treat acne. The apps, AcneApp and Acne Pwner, were sold in the iTunes App Store and Android Marketplace, respectively. The settlements ban the developers from stating certain health-related claims without scientific evidence. AcneApp’s developer has to pay the FTC $14,294 and the developer of Acne Pwnder must pay $1,700.

LMAO! Are you kidding me? Please tell me people have not gotten this stupid. Seriously please tell me that or I will be forced to believe that the 2006 movie Idiocracy is coming true.

You get the idea...wait...please tell me you get the idea...seriously...please.

Cliff Robertson, actor, dead, natural causes, 88

2011-09-11T12:30:00.000-05:00

The Academy Award-winning actor and screen veteran Cliff Robertson passed away yesterday from natural causes at Stony Brook University Medical Center, just one day after celebrating his 88th birthday. Beginning his career in the 1950s, Robertson made a number of film and television appearances such as Rod Brown of the Rocket Rangers (1953-1954), Picnic (1955), Gidget (1959), The Untouchables (1959), The Twilight Zone (1961-1962) and The Outer Limits (1963) before enjoying a breakthrough as Lt. John F. Kennedy in the wartime biopic PT 109 (1963). From 1966-1968, Robertson went on to make a number of appearances in the Batman television show, and in 1969 he received the Academy Award for Best Actor in a Leading Role for his performance in Ralph Nelson's 1968 drama Charly.

I was watching PT109 just last night. Great actor.

I haven't forgotten

2011-09-11T07:46:00.000-05:00

Never forget.

Boomer Sooner

2011-09-10T05:55:00.000-05:00

Its really nice to get the recognition....

...but some where deep inside me, I'd rather we weren't so prominently displayed.

Go Sooners.

The Sooners are off today. They'll be back on the field next week with a tough match-up against Florida State.

No Geo-Caching in Newcastle, Oklahoma

2011-09-09T05:55:00.000-05:00

Newcastle first responders enjoyed a wild-goose-chase-turned-treasure-hunt last Wednesday when a bomb scare turned out to be merely an Internet hobby enjoyed by millions around the world.

According to the police report, Newcastle Police responded to 305 Riley Road, located just north of the Newcastle All Sports Association's youth baseball and softball fields on SH-130.Roberto Estuardo Deloera called the supposed bomb into police after spotting it while cutting trees on the neighboring property. Deloera described the device as a round PVC pipe covered with camouflage duct tape hanging on a tree on the far north end of 3009 SH-130, the report said.

The story continues...Dianna Lynn Brown of Norman who was previous observed near the natural gas pumping station looking for a geo-cache took authorities to the next device, which was booked as evidence along with the other devices found that day.No charges were filed in the case, but Norman said any devices found by Newcastle police would be apprehended for the consideration of public safety."We will be picking up these type of devices to eliminate the chance that anyone might come upon them and believe them to be a bomb."

My hometown just put a stop to Geo-Caching. This type of ignorance is why I moved out of the town 25 years ago. The police would do better to learn a thing or two about how "internet games" are played. Why would anyone want to blow up a tree in the middle of a field? Common-sense is nearly non-existent on both sides of this issue. I will admit, placing a geo-cache on private property that just so happened to be a natural gas pumping station is pretty stupid. Welcome to small town America.

Well played sir, well played

2011-09-08T07:08:00.000-05:00

Nazis, needlework and my dadBy Patrick Barkham.Not many men belong to a stitching group, but Tony Casdagli picked up his enthusiasm for the craft from his father, who kept himself sane by fashioning subversive messages as a PoW during World War II.

After six months held by the Nazis in a prisoner of war camp, Major Alexis Casdagli was handed a piece of canvas by a fellow inmate. Pinching red and blue thread from a disintegrating pullover belonging to an elderly Cretan general, Casdagli passed the long hours in captivity by painstakingly creating a sampler in cross-stitch. Around decorative swastikas and a banal inscription saying he completed his work in December 1941, the British officer stitched a border of irregular dots and dashes. Over the next four years his work was displayed at the four camps in Germany where he was imprisoned, and his Nazi captors never once deciphered the messages threaded in Morse code: "God Save the King" and "Fuck Hitler".

Well done sir. Another fine example of our Greatest Generation.

Seriously poor editing

2011-09-08T05:55:00.000-05:00

I had to comment on this article and how poorly it was written. I'm sure an editor will correct it at any moment, so I screen capped it for you. This is the kind of poor writing and even worse editing that makes me wonder why I never attempted to be a news reporter. I can write betterer than this. No seriously, I can write more betterer seriously than writer can.
Link to story here.
Now on to the commentary....
What.the.hell.over?
This story is the reason Florida has it's own tag on FARK.COM.
Where do I start? First, I get it. You are working in a convenience store, arming yourself is probably a good idea. I'd be armed, and DISPLAY the weapon prominently on my hip, along with my shooting trophies and my marksmanship certificates. I'd probably even get a picture of me hanging out with the district attorney AT THE RANGE, HOLDING OUR GUNS for display in my store. I don't know this woman but she should seriously take ANOTHER course or two in gun safety.
Secondly, That was pretty decent of the boss to drive her to the hospital, I mean, it was the least she could do right? I think I would leverage my boss to buy my weapon and training courses. That way I could carry a gun, get it out and "show it to her" someday.
In actuality these ladies are probably best friends and will later this week pop a few of the shootee's pain pills and drink a few beers and have a few laughs about the incident. I can just hear the manager, "Remember that time I shot you, and you were like, 'owwww' and like 'OMG!' and like 'you bitch! you just shot me!' Good times, good times."

He finally caved

2011-09-06T05:55:00.000-05:00

Shannon Tweed finally put her foot down after being "unmarried" to KISS frontman Gene Simmons for almost three decades. And so, after a televised tiff on "The Joy Behar Show" and a brief break-up when Shannon moved out, the rock star and his former Playmate have reunited and are officially tying the knot.

When I learned that Gene had landed Shannon I thought, "lucky bastard, it'll never last". Well I was wrong, it lasted....30 years! But it lasted in part because Gene would never marry Shannon. And if you've ever watched their show, its a major sore spot for her. I guess the sore has festered a bit lately and Gene has decided to "go pro" as Tom Hank's character Rick Gassko so aptly put it in the 1984 movie Bachelor Party. (no I couldn't find a clip)So here's to Shannon and Gene. May your married years be as awesome as your unmarried years have been. Cheers.

Holy CRAP!

2011-09-05T12:19:00.000-05:00

MANILA, Philippines -- Villagers and veteran hunters have captured a one-ton saltwater crocodile which they plan to make the star of a planned ecotourism park in a southern Philippine town, an official said Monday.Mayor Edwin Cox Elorde said dozens of villagers and experts ensnared the 21-foot male crocodile along a creek in Bunawan township in Agusan del Sur province after a three-week hunt. It could be one of the largest crocodiles to be captured alive in recent years, he said, quoting local crocodile experts.

Holy crap that's a big crocodile. I wonder how old it is estimated to be? My friend lives in Florida and they had an alligator living in the community lake. It had a nasty habit of snatching small dogs from the shore. Well he snatched the wrong lady's dog and she had the city exterminate him. He was 7 foot long and was estimated at 100 years old. A lot of the residents were pretty upset with the extermination. Quoting one of the neighbors, "he's been swimming around for a hundred years.

People should know better than to walk their dogs near the lake shore. He's been here at longer than any of us will ever be."I for one have a list of rules. Actually guidelines really but I've lived this long abiding by them and it's served me well.

Shoot first, ask questions of the survivors if you didn't place your bullets correctly.
Never play cards with anyone who's name has the name of a city in it. New York Tony, Big Chicago Lou, etc...
Don't date chicks with dagger tattoos.
Never live anywhere that I am not the top consumer on the food chain.
When you are about to get stuck, merge on to the interstate, drive it like you stole it.

So you see living in Florida might violate this Devil Dog's rule number four. I've seen the big alligators while on the swamp boat tours. No thank you. They have way too many laws protecting these nasty bastards to suit me. But I see the point of the protections at the same time. They would be all but extinct if you didn't protect them. With all the protection they are being found all the way up into Oklahoma now. I'm pretty sure our nasty winters will keep them at bay.

Former Bucs and Oklahoma Sooner DE Lee Roy Selmon dies

2011-09-04T19:28:00.002-05:00

TAMPA, Fla. -- Lee Roy Selmon, the first player ever drafted by the Tampa Bay Buccaneers, died Sunday, according to a statement from his family that was released by St. Joseph's Hospital.Selmon was 56."It is with very heavy hearts that the Selmon family announces the passing of our beloved husband, father and brother, Lee Roy Selmon," the statement said. "Lee Roy passed away today surrounded by family and friends at St. Joseph's Hospital.

The Sooner Nation looses another great. The State of Oklahoma looses another icon.

Where Have I Been?

2011-09-03T13:24:00.000-05:00

My regular readers are probably wondering where I've been. Well a lot has happened this year. I started a new position at my place of employment and have been busy learning about Business Objects and the wonderful world of Enterprise Data Warehouses. Wonderful might be over stated. But I am no longer resetting peoples passwords and telling them to turn the printer on BEFORE printing, all day long.

I have also started back to school. I may or may not have told you all that I never finished college. Now with my kids out of the house and me with plenty of time on my hands I have started back to school at night. Ii will graduate with an Administrative Leadership Degree from the University of Oklahoma. My friends have already volunteered their house and to pay for the liquor. So I've got that going for me...

And some sad news this past week, I also lost my mother. It was a sudden and unexpected heart attack. I now have the added responsibility of sorting out all of her belongings and her estate.

So the combination of these life changing events has limited my news commentary quite a lot. Looking at my stats it seems a lot of people still come to the site daily, I'm not entirely sure how or why at this point. I have thought about this page often and want to get back to posting. So if you were hoping to hear that from me, bully for you. Thanks for your continued support. And I'll you'll see me back on the blog soon.

Very cool. Way to go Mila

2011-07-11T09:49:00.000-05:00

Most men will spend their lives dreaming about going on a date with Mila Kunis – but for one U.S. Marine, that fantasy may very well turn into a reality.

Sgt. Scott Moore, of the 3rd Battalion 2nd Marines in Musa Qala, Afghanistan, last week set up a YouTube page and posted a video asking the “Friends With Benefits” star to accompany him to the Marine Corps Ball on November 18th in Greenville, North Carolina.

“Have you seen this? Have you heard about this? You need to do it for your country,” Timberlake asked Kunis excitedly, before sending out a direct message to Moore. “I’m going to work on this, man. This needs to go down.”

After questioning her publicist if she knew about the invitation, the clearly flattered 27-year-old actress agreed.

Mila, you'll be very happy you did. The Marine Corps Ball is something everyone should see just once. Few events have so much tradition. You will be moved. And not that you are worried about it...you will be noticed. I can't wait to see the picture of the night.

Chavez, is he on Death's door step?

2011-06-28T09:00:00.000-05:00

CARACAS, Venezuela -- Allies of President Hugo Chavez assured Venezuelans on Monday the leftist leader is firmly in control of the country and improving after emergency surgery in Cuba, comments meant to dampen speculation about his health.

Pro-Chavez lawmaker Cilia Flores told state television that Chavez "is fulfilling all of the responsibilities" under the constitution, and said she had spoken to him earlier in the day.

We can only hope. Maybe that statement is kind of harsh. But Hugo Chavez is America's biggest adversary in this hemisphere. He is crazy drunk on power and his democracy turned into a dictatorship in the stroke of a pen. I know some Venezuelans like socialism. Just like here in our own country, some people there believe the state should provide for them. I don't believe that was the intention of our founding fathers.

This is the question? What will Venezuela do with out Chavez? Will they return to the table with America and resume normal relations and trading? We could certainly use their oil and they could certainly use our...what do we produce these days? Cars? nope they are in Mexico and Canada. Computers? nope those have been in Asia for nearly 20 years. Clothing? nope Indonesia and China.

What do we have to offer them for oil? Other than cash, which we are borrowing at the rate of 40,000$(US) a second.

I once wished this man would get herpes and boils on his ass. I guess I nearly got my wish. I'm sure my grandmother would tell me it is not good to wish ill on any man. So with that said, I hope this latest illness forces him into blissful retirement.

Peter Falk, dead, old age, 83

2011-06-25T09:02:00.000-05:00

The Emmy Award-winning actor Peter Falk has passed away at his home in Beverly Hills, California, aged 83. Although no cause of death has been released, the screen veteran, who was best known for his portrayal as the TV detective Columbo, had been battling dementia and Alzheimer's disease for some time.

Serpentine, serpentine.

The funniest movie ever...The In-Laws (1979)

Party Down on Me Hogs

2011-06-20T08:50:00.000-05:00

YORK, England – A British soldier killed by a Taliban bomb in Afghanistan left $161,500 in his will -- so his friends could go on vacation to Las Vegas, The Sun reported Monday.

Royal Marine David Hart, who had taken out a $403,800 life insurance policy before he was deployed to Afghanistan, stipulated in a letter that in the event of his death, his friends and their partners should travel to Sin City for a massive party in his memory.

David seems to have loved life and loved his friends. Semper Fidelis Marine or perhaps as your mates may say, Per Mare, Per Terram. Thank you for your sacrifice.

Exciting Weather

2011-06-15T08:09:00.002-05:00

We got HAMMERED last night from the storm. Reports of a tornado are unfounded. As we walked home from the ball park we watched the rotation everyone is describing on twitter and other media. It was not a tornado but it looked like it was going to form one. We got home just in time for the hail to really start coming down. I have a video of the hail smacking the window. I will try to post it later.

Lots of trees were down. Big trees and little a like. Most of my neighbors who used wood posts lost their fences. I used metal poles and only lost one unsupported half section next to the house.

The wind was blowing 75-80mph from the north. Then it stopped and switched to blowing from the south at 60-70mph. That continued in each direction for a good 10 minutes. Our power was out for 4 or 5 hours.

A half mile east of us...we left the ball field just behind the power lines she is talking about being able to touch.

There is another video on the link that is from a half mile north of the DDDN studios.

Reporting live from Norman, I'm Eric Stephens, DDDN....

US Army FINALLY stops pretending to be French

2011-06-14T14:20:00.000-05:00

The U.S. Army said Monday that it was abandoning the beret, after a failed 10-year experiment.

The black beret, which proved deeply unpopular with American soldiers, will be replaced by a patrol cap for everyday wear, U.S. Army spokesman Col. Tom Collins said.

The move came after outgoing Army chief of staff, Gen. Martin Dempsey, asked the Army's sergeant major "to go out and talk to soldiers across the force and see what was on their minds," Collins told AFP.

"One of the things that soldiers consistently brought up was the desire to wear the patrol cap as part of their duty uniform," he said.

FINALLY! I know a few soldiers and I don't believe I every heard one of them say they liked the beret. The Army in one bold step have once again elevated the status of the berets worn by their special forces, Airborne, Green Berets, Rangers to their special status. Viva Le ~~France~~ US ARMY.

The Dirk is obviously an alien

2011-06-10T07:53:00.000-05:00

DALLAS -- Dirk Nowitzki waited five long years for that elusive third victory over Miami, yet there was only a short celebration when it finally came.

He briefly thrust both arms in the air, a sea of blue screaming around him, but then quickly walked off the floor.

To Nowitzki, the real party can't come until next week.

"There's really nothing to celebrate," he said. "We're going in there Sunday swinging, like we did today, from the jump, and hopefully steal one Sunday."

You know I have no love for the NBA. I've said it so many times. But this season I could not help but watch the kids from OKC make a deep run in the playoffs. It was good to see the kids show their potential. It was not good to see a space alien take over the series and win.

Now more than ever I believe Nowitzki is from from another planet. He obviously throttled down his scoring in the NBA FINALS to bring less attention to himself. But what he doesn't know is WE KNOW HE IS AN ALIEN. We've known since he scored 97 points and against OKC in game 2 of the conference finals. Nobody makes every free throw, especially German people. That's how we know he is an extraterrestrial alien. Dirk made every free throw except one, which an unnamed source with NASA told us was precisely when they saw a high level of gamma radiation directed at the arena. NASA is convinced it was call from his mother from his home planet.

The most expensive trio of players in the universe is going to loose the next game to Dirk Nowitzki and those "other guys from Dallas". The good news is "the other guys from Dallas" will get control of their bodies again because Dirk will not need them to do his bidding in the off season. Maybe if we are lucky Dirk will decide he wants to play soccer for the Chicago Fire in the off season.

Army Ranger is awarded the Medal of Honor

2011-06-10T07:32:00.000-05:00

When Army Sergeant First Class Leroy A. Petry receives the Medal of Honor from President Obama next month, the Santa Fe resident will have to make sure the batteries are recharged for the prosthetic right hand he extends to friends and strangers alike.

He grabbed a grenade with his right hand and threw it back. That's bad ass. Thank you sir for your sacrifice.

Taquitos Save Lives

2011-06-01T07:54:00.001-05:00

Zac and Amber Wyzard said they were parked in front of Walmart Neighborhood Market when they saw a white pickup truck pull up in front of the door, followed by a Tulsa Police car. Amber Wyzard said she saw a man with a gun, who was wearing white gloves, go inside the store. The Wyzards said they heard about six shots once the man was inside the door.

"We were about to go in, I was eating my taquito and she was like ‘hurry up, it's hot' and we saw this truck come in and I was like 'Thank God we didn't go in,'" Zac said.

Getting hot and sweaty nearly killed them, but they were saved by the taquito and it's need to be eaten. Remember the next time you are in South Tulsa, stop and get a taquito before going into a Walmart Neighborhood Market...it just might save your life.

And to the carjacking victim Robert. Where is your shirt? Do people just drive around without shirts? I was under the assumption that the signs you see posted, "No Shirt, No Shoes, No Service" were more effective.

Movie Videos & Movie Scenes at MOVIECLIPS.com

Lose the attitude

2011-05-28T05:55:00.001-05:00

This is Gary England. If you don't live in Oklahoma he's just some old weather man with a funny accent. If you live in Oklahoma, this is the man you turn to to tell you when the EF5 tornado is going to hit your trailer house.

In short, he is a god, a god of weather prediction, or perhaps he is the patron saint of weather, you get the idea. He is(was) the man. He is a local celebrity and worshiped by many. The Lost Ogle (a local OKC blog) even markets and sells shirts in his honor. That's where I picked up this clip of Gary laying down the law.

I've been watching Gary on TV since 1971 when we moved back to Oklahoma from Guam. Norman Oklahoma is the home of the National Severe Storms Center. In the shadow of that institution the 'big three' channels (CBS, ABC, NBC) in OKC spent ridiculous amounts of money on weather radar. The competition is fierce too. The "big three" all have their signature weather men. There is something for everyone.
If you want to hear about how you are about to die: Mike Morgan, NBC
If you are sure you are not going to die: Rick Mitchell, ABC
If you want a no nonsense approach to what the weather is doing: Gary England, CBS

I have literally heard Mike Morgan tell us we were all going to die during the Christmas Eve Snowpocalype of 2009. It was a blizzard. We've seen them before. Chill out man.

We've once again been the victim of the brutal weather on the plains. Deadly weather. The tornadoes that wrecked the state on May 24, 2011 killed 25 people (as of this post) in Oklahoma. They could have killed hundreds more if it were not for these weathermen and their amazing radar technology. We are fortunate to have hours to prepare or get out of the way due to their storm tracking broadcasts.

While we all joke about what Okies do when they hear the tornado sirens, they go outside and film the tornado of course but we manage to survive. The news room is no place for attitude when someone out there is facing this... May 24, 2011, Piedmont Oklahoma Tornado, (5:54) or this... April 14th, 2011, Tushka Oklahoma, Multi-Vortex Tornado (5:06)

Well played you cheeky bastards

2011-05-27T05:55:00.000-05:00

More than one person has wanted to call Barack Obama a 'smart alec', and now British police will get the chance to do so without getting reprimanded.
That's because Scotland Yard has tapped the codename 'Chalaque' to refer to the U.S. president for security reasons during his upcoming state visit to the United Kingdom May 24-26.

Indarjit Singh, a Punjabi speaker in the UK who is director of the Network of Sikh Organisations, told the Sunday Times the word 'is sometimes used when we want to denigrate someone who we think is too clever for their own good'.

I'm sure President Obama would appreciate the humor in the name.

If you can't laugh at yourself, then how can you laugh at anybody else? I think people see the human side of you when you do that.

- Payne Stewart

What do nerds talk about in their nerderies?

2011-05-26T05:55:00.000-05:00

Which topic are science journalists most likely to talk about when they get together?
A) The epistemological issues raised by multiverse theories;
B) The revival of social Darwinist ideas in Tea Party rhetoric;
C) The relevance of experiments on sea slug brains to the debate over free will;
D) Statistical evidence linking global warming to this spring's tornado outbreak;
or E) None of the above.

The answer is E, because what science journalists usually talk about when they get together is the sorry state of science journalism (including health and technology).

Richard Hayden: My fellow nerds and I will retire to the nerdery with our calculators.

Fark.com Headline: This isn't 'Nam; this is gopher hunting. There are rules

2011-05-25T05:55:00.001-05:00

It's springtime in Montana, and that can mean only one thing: gopher hunting.

But while going afield in search of vermin is a popular rite of spring here, the hobby can exasperate landowners who have not invited people to open fire in their fields.

A major problem, as Sheppard sees it, is people shooting from public roads at the critters - which are actually Richardson's ground squires but referred to as gophers everywhere between here and wherever Caddyshack was filmed.

DDDN: "Correct me if I'm wrong, but if I go shooting all the ground squires they are going to lock me up and throw away the key."

Editor: Ground squirrels....DOH!

I love to catch editing mistakes.

Whether you like it or not...

2011-05-24T07:31:00.000-05:00

Next month, the National Highway Traffic Safety Administration is expected to declare that all vehicles must contain an event data recorder, known more commonly as a “black box.” The device, similar to those found in aircraft, records vehicle inputs and, in the event of a crash, provides a snapshot of the final moments before impact.

That snapshot could be viewed by law enforcement, insurance companies and automakers. The device cannot be turned off, and you’ll probably know little more about it than the legal disclosure you’ll find in the owner’s manual.

The pending mandate looks to some like a gross overreach of government authority, or perhaps an effort by Uncle Sam, the insurance industry and even the automakers to keep tabs on what drivers are doing. But if you’re driving a car with airbags, chances are there’s already one of these devices under your hood.

I'm not with the privacy people on this. If this device can be used to LOWER my car insurance fees...then bring it on. I pay a ridiculous amount for car insurance, mainly because of two younger drivers, but also because we are pretty safe drivers, obey the traffic laws (for the most part) and drive the speed limit on city streets.

I'd like it better if they would crack down on drivers WITHOUT insurance, including towing their cars and notifying local constabularies when someone's insurance drops. If we are all supposed to have it then punish those who don't. Stop punishing those who BUY IT with higher rates because people around them don't own it.

Where my foot does come down is making us retro fit old cars with devices. That is definitely unfair.

For Girl Scouts and Army Rangers

2011-05-21T14:29:00.002-05:00

I recently mentioned America's First Sergeant's post on Zombie Preparedness in a blog post.

I have a response for his recommendation of the Dead On Tools 14 inch wrecking bar as a Zombie deterrent.

" Dear First Sergeant,

I'll see your Dead On and raise you a Stanley Fat Max Extreme FuBar III. We recently visited our local Forest Lumber store (which was awesome) to pick up free rain barrels, anyway, I was telling my buddy Larry about your post on Zombie Preparedness. We were scoping out wrecking bars and roofing hammers and came across this beauty. I've decided the Dead On Tools 14 inch wrecking bar is for Girl Scouts and Army Rangers."

As you all can see, that is a tool!

I couldn’t get over the FuBar name, a totally classic Marine acronym (Google FUBAR if you don't know).

Pictured above is my buddy Larry Fisher, Norman Oklahoma.

Lifeguards can make a hundred grand? Dammit!

2011-05-20T08:48:00.000-05:00

That's the kind of reaction Newport Beach's 13-member full-time lifeguard crew has drawn this month, since the local newspaper editorialized about lifeguard salaries, benefits and overtime pay that in at least two instances top $200,000 (with $400 for sun protection) as the city struggles to rein in pension costs.

The ensuing debate over the merits of having lifeguards as well-paid as some CEOs has divided this wealthy coastal city, spawned a pro-lifeguard Facebook page and created headlines as far away as England ("Time for a Career Change? California's Baywatch lifeguards paid up to $210,000 per year!").

This may seem like a cushy job for a hundred grand. Yeah you get to ogle Betty's in bikinis all day...at the beach. Yeah it seems like a great job to those who go to the beach for recreation.

This job has its detraction's too... drunks, drunks swimming, perverts, drowning people, sunburn and skin cancer risks, drug dealers....think of something a street cop has to deal with and those lifeguards deal with it too.

This story reminded me of a movie from WAY BACK in the day (1976).

Lifeguard

I thought this movie was pretty good. I can really feel for Rick Carlson (played by Sam Elliot). He's an old man in a young man's career. He loves his job and is coming to the realization that he can't do it forever....but maybe just one more summer.

Looking at this now I guess he'll do alright with his pension. Who's feeling sorry for who now?

Castra Praetoria: Zombie Prepardness: Centers for Disease Control

2011-05-20T08:12:00.000-05:00

Once again America's First Sergeant comes through with an awesome post and gives us a practical response to the CDC's Preparedness 101: Zombie Apocalypse blog post.

I mean really, what kind of zombie preparedness plan doesn't even mention flame throwers?
- America's 1stSgt

Classic!

Thank you 1stSgt for the tips and thank you for all you do for us back home.

Castra Praetoria: Zombie Prepardness: Centers for Disease Control

CDC: Zombie Apocalypse

2011-05-18T22:17:00.000-05:00

Are you prepared for the impending zombie invasion?

That's the question posed by the Centers for Diseases Control and Prevention in a Monday blog posting gruesomely titled, "Preparedness 101: Zombie Apocalypse." And while it's no joke, CDC officials say it's all about emergency preparation.

"There are all kinds of emergencies out there that we can prepare for," the posting reads. "Take a zombie apocalypse for example. That's right, I said z-o-m-b-i-e a-p-o-c-a-l-y-p-s-e. You may laugh now, but when it happens you'll be happy you read this, and hey, maybe you'll even learn a thing or two about how to prepare for a real emergency."

"First of all, you should have an emergency kit in your house," the posting continues. "This includes things like water, food, and other supplies to get you through the first couple of days before you can locate a zombie-free refugee camp (or in the event of a natural disaster, it will buy you some time until you are able to make your way to an evacuation shelter or utility lines are restored)."

I need a bumper sticker for my Range Rover...

Oh Reaaaaaaly? Hypocrite.

2011-05-16T05:55:00.002-05:00

A stash of pornography was found in the Pakistani compound of Usama bin Laden raided last week by Navy SEALs, U.S. officials tell Reuters.

The pornography taken from the compound consists of modern, electronically recorded video and is fairly extensive, officials said.

U.S. officials said materials taken during the raid were the largest cache of ~~PORN~~ intelligence taken from one source.

The discovery of pornography taken during raids on Islamic militants is not uncommon, officials told Reuters.

The naughty little buggers. And they say our society is corrupt and perverted. Seems to me that they maybe shouldn't be throwing stones in the proverbial glass house.

Knock, knock.

Burkina: "Who is it?"

Minaret Repairman: "I'm here to fix your minaret."

Bow-chicca-wow-wow.

There Can Be Only One

2011-05-13T14:34:00.001-05:00

MADRID – Spanish regional government authorities say a man has beheaded a woman in a supermarket on the Spanish resort island of Tenerife in the Canary Islands.

A witness told broadcaster Cadena Ser that he saw the man drop a bloodstained woman's head on the pavement after coming out of the store.

This is a horribly violent crime. I had to mention the obvious reference to Highlander.

Happy Birthday Steve

2011-05-11T07:01:00.001-05:00

Happy Birthday Steve, enjoy. I hope your day is as entertaining as this....

This video is CHOCK full of double entendre.

If you need more...Part 1.

A revolutionary leap forward

2011-05-09T05:55:00.003-05:00

In an industry where unbreakable and smaller are best, the world's first interactive paper computer looks set to dominate for years to come.

The PaperPhone has a flexible electronic display that is set to herald a new generation of computers.

Extremely lightweight and made out of a thin-film, the prototype device can do everything a smartphone currently does.

At first I thought this was a hoax. But apparently it is not. I can't even imagine a phone I can't break. I'm wondering how long until we have interactive books for kids and comic books that you WATCH and interact with.

Chuck Norris is Pissed

2011-05-06T05:51:00.001-05:00

Wilson, Oklahoma — Chuck Norris may have a place in the hearts of Wilson residents, but it is the Senior Class of 2011 that has taken his place on the water tower.

A banner proclaiming “Seniors 2011” has been duct-taped over Norris’ name on the water tower and it has left some residents in an uproar. While there has not been an act of vandalism committed, Wilson authorities are concerned about safety issues.

Don't these kids follow Chuck Norris Facts.com?

When Chuck reads this story he will be visiting each member of the senior class of Wilson. They will be awakened in their beds with a round house kick to the head.

Call the Whambulance

2011-05-05T12:23:00.000-05:00

Usama bin Laden was within reach of two weapons when U.S. forces found him in the main building of his compound in northern Pakistan, Fox News has learned. Though bin Laden was unarmed, Fox News was told earlier in the week that he appeared to be reaching for a weapon before he was fatally shot.

The senior U.S. official also told Fox News that only one of the five people killed in the raid was carrying a weapon and firing. The detail seemed at first to diverge from White House accounts claiming the Navy SEALs encountered resistance throughout the raid and were engaged in a firefight during much of the 40-minute operation.

White House and Defense Department and CIA officials through the week have offered varying versions of the operation, though the dominant focus was on the firefight.

I DON'T CARE!!!

I don't give a damn if they were armed or unarmed, or if they put up a fight, I don't care if bin Laden was reaching for his teddy bear or a AK-47, or if bin Laden was sleeping on 400 or 600 thread count Egyptian cotton sheets, I couldn't care less whether or not the SEALs smoked cigars and listened to rock-a-billy in the helicopters on the way home. I hope they did. Hell, I wish I was there to hand out the cigars and shake their hands.

I have no sympathy for these murderers and neither should you. If given a chance, they would order someone else to KILL EACH AND EVERY ONE YOU IN YOUR SLEEP for simply not following their radical brand of fascist Islamic beliefs.

I'm only sorry we didn't have the opportunity to kill more of them in the raid. Hopefully the intelligence we gathered will lead us to more compounds where these cowardly fascist bastards live so we can slip in and slaughter them in their pajamas with extreme prejudice.

Sleep well f@#kers, keep one eye open.

Biden amazed bin Laden raid plans kept secret

2011-05-05T10:49:00.001-05:00

At the beginning of remarks this evening to the Atlantic Council, an international policy group, Vice President Joe Biden voiced amazement that the plans for the raid on Osama bin Laden's compound remained secret.

"There was such an absolute overwhelming desire to accomplish this mission that although for over several months we were in the process of planning it and there were as many as 16 members of Congress who were briefed on it - not a single solitary thing leaked."

"I find that absolutely amazing," said Biden to applause from his audience.

The key to this being kept secret...they didn't tell Joe about the raids until they had already been executed. Quite frankly, I'm surprised he didn't then go on to give a shout out to all the members of SEAL Team 6, BY NAME, mentioning how relieved their WIVES and CHILDREN were that they returned safely.

Man Live-Tweets U.S. Raid on Osama bin Laden Without Knowing It

2011-05-03T05:56:00.000-05:00

Sohaib Athar, a resident of Abbottabad, Pakistan, spent Sunday's wee hours tweeting about helicopters circling overhead and a mysterious blast. Little did he imagine that he was recording the U.S. attack on the world's most wanted terrorist.

On his Twitter page, Athar (@ReallyVirtual) describes himself as "an IT consultant taking a break from the rat-race by hiding in the mountains with his laptops." But this weekend, he found himself at the center of the action. At about 1 a.m. local time on Sunday, Athar tweeted about a "helicopter hovering above Abbottabad (a rare event)," later joking that he might have to make use of his "giant swatter."

Later, our unsuspecting witness caught wind of the news that the noise wasn't for nothing. "Uh oh, now I'm the guy who liveblogged the Osama raid without knowing it," he finally recognized. "And here come the mails from the mainstream media… *sigh*." So much for achieving anonymity in the mountains.

Oops. Start the clock on this guy's 15 minutes of fame. I wonder how long it will take for him to get to a million followers? 65,246 at 1400 CDT.

Osama bin Laden's last residence not getting good reviews

2011-05-03T05:55:00.001-05:00

Read the reviews.

Robert - May 2, 2011
I can't see anything there's 18 foot walls all around me and no windows facing anything good. This place is a dump, plus it smells like old laundry. I guess I feel pretty secure tho with the 18 foot walls, oh wait here comes 40 navy seals with sub-machine guns

Clay - May 2, 2011
Disappointed in the service. The only thing on the menu was goat flesh, and the place reeked of burning garbage.

Guess who else had a death announcement on May 1st?

2011-05-02T07:23:00.000-05:00

May 1st, 1945: Germany announces Hitler is dead.

Adolf Hitler has been killed at the Reich Chancery in Berlin, according to Hamburg radio.

At 2230 local time a newsreader announced that reports from the Fuhrer's headquarters said Hitler had "fallen at his command post in the Reich Chancery fighting to the last breath against Bolshevism and for Germany".

2230 local time? That's when I learned Usama bin Laden was dead.
Stalin and Hitler will now have to clear out some space to make room for their new roommate.

He's dead Jim

2011-05-02T07:19:00.001-05:00

The brave men of SEAL Team 6 took out Usama bin Laden this weekend. Nine and a half years after he organized the murders of Americans across the eastern seaboard we finally got him.

I hope today we can start a new era of understanding between radical Islam and the rest of the world. We will not tolerate fascism and that we will continue to have the resolve to find you and kill you if you continue Usama bin Laden's work. Come to the table of peace and find your way in this world.

Pakistan, I'm going to need a gesture on your part to make me feel like you are WITH us in this fight against fascism. What do you say?

Out of work Ninja

2011-05-02T05:55:00.000-05:00

Epic.

Potentially, The Greatest Invention Since the Internet

2011-04-30T05:55:00.001-05:00

I would trade a cow for these magic beans. Seriously. "Coffee Joulies" are a new invention that are stainless steel "beans" that keep your coffee at the perfect temperature for several hours. Hours.

How do they work? Their Kickstarter page says:

his material is designed to melt at 140 degrees Fahrenheit, and absorbs a lot of energy as it melts. This is how Joulies cool your coffee down three times faster than normal. Once it reaches this temperature, the special material begins to solidify again, releasing the energy it stored when it melted. This is how Joulies keep your coffee warm twice as long.

I'm pretty sure I'll be getting one of these for Father's Day. I'll let you know how awesome they are then.

Rule the High Seas With Your Very Own Aircraft Carrier

2011-04-29T05:55:00.002-05:00

Lovers of the big blue sea, prepare yourselves -- because super-huge yachts are so 2010.

Britain's Ministry of Defense (MoD) has put the Royal Navy's former flagship aircraft carrier, the HMS Ark Royal, up for sale on an official used equipment website, eDisposals. Indeed, ruling the waves just took on a whole new meaning.

I would love to own this. If I had a spare couple of dozen million pounds laying around I'd be bidding on it. Can you imagine having your very own aircraft carrier? I'd sail right up to that scow Adnan Khashoggi floats around in and show him what a real ship is supposed to look like.

The New Ghost Towns

2011-04-28T05:55:00.000-05:00

There are several counties in America, each with more than 10,000 homes, which have vacancy rates above 55%. The rate is above 60% in several.

Most people who follow unemployment and the housing crisis would expect high vacancy rates in hard-hit states including Nevada, Florida and Arizona. They were among the fastest growing areas from 2000 to 2010. Disaster struck once economic growth ended.

Palm Coast, Florida, Las Vegas, Nevada and Cape Coral, Florida were all among the former high fliers. Many large counties which have 20% or higher occupancy rates are in these same regions. Lee County, Florida, Yuma County, Arizona, Mohave County, Arizona, and Osceola, Florida each had a precipitous drop in home prices and increases in vacancy rates as home buyers disappeared when the economy went south.

If I were more affluent, enjoyed flying, and had lots of free time, I'd snap up one of those homes on the coast in a second. Instead, I live in the central states, I don't like to fly, I don't have gobs of free time and I'm just a peasant with a pay check. Oh well.

Some of the locations will surprise you.

Did ancient man "run" down his food?

2011-04-27T05:55:00.000-05:00

On the plains of New Mexico, a band of elite marathoners tests a controversial theory of evolution: that humans can outrun the fastest animals on earth. Read outrun as "out last".

THROUGH THE BINOCULARS I see them: nine tiny men in bright jerseys running in formation across the vast short-grass prairie of eastern New Mexico. They're chasing a tawny pronghorn antelope through the crackling stalks of late summer's fading wild sunflowers. The buck weighs about 130 pounds, like the men racing after it, but that's about the only thing they have in common.

The pronghorn is the second-fastest animal on earth, while the men are merely elite marathon runners who are trying to verify a theory about human evolution. Some scientists believe that our ancestors evolved into endurance athletes in order to hunt quadrupeds by running them to exhaustion. If the theory holds up, the antelope I'm watching will eventually tire and the men will catch it. Then they'll have to decide whether to kill it for food or let it go.

My question is the obvious one. Are more calories expended running down the prey than could be consumed by eating the animal? If that is true I would say it was highly unlikely that man did this regularly.

Spoke too soon

2011-04-26T21:27:00.000-05:00

Despite the surge in popularity of PCs, and their smaller digital cousins the iPads, the typewriter is far from dead, said Ed Michael, general manager of sales at Moonachie, N.J.-based Swintec. So forget Godrej: Swintec seems to be the last typewriter maker in operation.

"Typewriters are alive and well," Michael told FoxNews.com. Most big offices need a typewriter or two or three to do some special jobs -- special forms, multipart forms. Some places need to have typewriters to do original forms such as birth certificates, death certificates, things like that."

I stand corrected. Stupid fact checkers.

Update: Unbelievable corruption, a secret pension fund

2011-04-26T07:44:00.000-05:00

LOS ANGELES -- A former public official accused of orchestrating a scam that nearly bankrupted a working-class Los Angeles suburb set up a secret pension fund containing $4.5 million to skirt retirement limits for California public employees, according to a newspaper report Monday.

One account benefited 40 employees, guaranteeing them at least $2,000 a month if they retire as early as age 52 and had spent five years in office. That's in addition to their normal payments from the state pension system.

This is unbelievable. I hope they go to PMITA prison for a long time and their pensions are taken from them. This is the kinda crap that causes people to turn against the government and cause apathy in the citizenry.

Sad: Last Typewriter Factory in the World Shuts Its Doors

2011-04-26T07:10:00.000-05:00

With only about 200 machines left -- and most of those in Arabic languages -- Godrej and Boyce shut down its plant in Mumbai, India, today. "Although typewriters became obsolete years ago in the west, they were still common in India -- until recently," according to the Daily Mail, which ran a special story this morning about the typewriters demise. "Demand for the machines has sunk in the last ten years as consumers switch to computers." Secretaries, rejoice.

It's kinda sad to us "old folks" to see typewriters go away. I learned to type in 1978 on an Underwood Type 5 at Newcastle High School. Typing was a one year course at my high school. Today I think they call it Keyboarding or some such nonsense and it is a semester long. Of course my children type a great deal more than I did in high school. They each have their own laptop and they type on iPhones to their hearts content.

You don't know the frustration and magic of the typewriter until you are typing a term paper due the next day and you make a mistake and have to retype AN ENTIRE PAGE because you left one word out of a sentence.

Political Correctness Going too FAR

2011-04-14T07:00:00.003-05:00

School Renames Easter Eggs 'Spring Spheres'

A sophomore at a local private high school thinks an effort to make Easter politically correct is ridiculous.

Jessica, 16, told KIRO Radio's Dori Monson Show that a week before spring break, the students commit to a week-long community service project. She decided to volunteer in a third grade class at a public school, which she would like to remain nameless.

This political correctness crap has got to stop. I thought it was bad in the 1990s but some of the things that have come up in the last two or three years is making me crazy.
An egg is not a sphere, it is an ellipsoid.
You would think a SCHOOL with all its geometry teachers, would know that.

Up, up and away

2011-04-13T06:39:00.000-05:00

When Abby Gardner and her siblings let go of a balloon to mark New Year's Day, they probably thought it might travel a few miles.

They attached a note and stamp what had been a present to celebrate Abby's birthday on Christmas Eve and sent it off.

Being young children, they then completely forgot about it - until a man from Laos, in south east Asia 6,000 miles away wrote to say he had found it.

That's pretty cool. I've done this before. My boss had a party for their young son and after all was said and done they had not used all the helium in the tank they borrowed.

So I went down to the local fun store and bought several of those huge balloons. I put a note in each one and filled them up to 3 or 4 feet in diameter. We let them go on a windy day. They rose high in the air and as of this post 23 years have passed and we haven't heard a word from any one.

150 Years Ago

2011-04-12T04:30:00.012-05:00

April 12, 1861 - At 4:30 a.m. Confederates under Gen. Pierre Beauregard open fire with 50 cannons upon Fort Sumter in Charleston, South Carolina. The Civil War begins. Civil War Time Line.

Our nation was divided and the war that began at this hour, on this day, 150 years ago would change the history of our nation forever.

Remember those who died to define our nation.

Effective...I may have to try this next time

2011-04-11T07:00:00.001-05:00

WWRD? (What Would Red Do?)

LOMA RICA — A Yuba County man who allegedly blew out his son's stereo speaker with a shotgun after complaining about loud music won't be charged, according to the Yuba County District Attorney's Office.

Stanislaw Grzegorz Jarmolowicz was arrested Monday at his home in the 6200 block of Stonehedge Drive, east of Loma Rica.

According to a Yuba County Sheriff's Department report, Jarmolowicz asked his 24-year-old son several times to either turn down the music or put on headphones.

"The son said he turned down the stereo, but dad thought he didn't, and shot the speakers out with a shotgun after first telling his son to get out of the way," said department spokeswoman Melanie Oakes.

Actually my kids are pretty good at not turning up the crappy music they play. I suggest you talk to your local DA before attempting this method of noise control.

Updated: Oil heading toward 112$(US) a barrel

2011-04-08T10:52:00.001-05:00

Does anyone remember the last time we had oil prices like this?

Does anyone remember the vitriolic news stories about how the president at that time was at fault for the whole thing?

Funny, I don't see the same kind of response from the media this time around.
Here's a good example.

Things that make you go hmmmmmm....

Bad at math

2011-04-07T07:06:00.002-05:00

The president has said he keeps a check list of promises he made during the campaign in his pocket. Last fall Mr. Obama told "Rolling Stone" he figured his administration had "probably accomplished 70 percent of the things that we said we were going to do."

The watchdog organization Politifact.com* has been keeping track and puts candidate Obama's list of promises at a staggering 506, of those they say the president has kept 122, or 24 percent. Coincidentally, of the 25 selected as the most significant promises, politifact.com says Obama has followed through on six, for a 'promise-kept percentage' of 24 percent.

Did the president pull the list out of his pocket and look at it before he answered this question in the interview?

I know Americans are really bad at math. I would have thought that a president would have a better grasp of math than the average guy. At a minimum he would have someone who would do the math for him. But 70% and 24% are not even close.

Read this the way you want to. But I can't help but think, "what is on the president's list?"

So I put together a list of the things I'd do if I were president and perhaps some of those items are on President Obama's list. So here's the list:

Take out the trash.
Send wife to Spain.
Kick back something to ~~George S~~ my favorite donor.
Visit Brazil.
Visit all the states that helped get me elected.
Quit smoking.
Take care of Bob at "the bank".
Visit the troops at the front.
Meet the Yankees. Tell them you are a Padres fan.
Tell Hugo Chavez to shut his pie hole before something bad happens.
Meet the remaining Beatles.
Give some well deserving soldiers, sailors and Marines some metals of valor.
Have the Super Bowl Champions over to the house for some dinner.
Visit Elkhart, Indiana.
Meet the Queen of England.
Drink beer with some guys in the Rose Garden.
Take the wife and kids to see the Grand Canyon.

I'm sure you can come up with some to add to your presidential list. These were just the ones I could come up with that I'd do if I were president.

State Worker Who Took Fridays Off For 17 Years

2011-04-06T08:12:00.000-05:00

The former director of the state prison system’s food operations – who cheated state taxpayers out of a half million dollars using falsified travel and attendance documents – pleaded guilty to second degree grand larceny in Oneida County Court. Howard Dean, director of the Department of Corrections’ Food Production Center (DOCS) was paid huge sums for falsified travel reimbursement claims and fraudulently filed attendance records. He also failed to indicate he took every Friday off for 17 years.

I can't believe they aren't going after him for more money. I also can't believe he isn't serving a day in prison for every Friday he cheated the state out of. That's 884 days at 52 days a year for 17 years. That's 2.4 years in prison.

Thank you for reinforcing the stereotype of the "typical state worker".

World Dumbest Soccer Player

2011-04-06T07:24:00.000-05:00

O.M.G. I'm speechless.
As Calen Carr, formerly of the Chicago Fire and now playing for a lesser team in Houston, said on Twitter, "stay in school kids... AMAZING!!!"

Headshot

2011-04-05T20:05:00.000-05:00

Manning the top of a compound south of Sangin, Afghanistan, Sgt. Paul Boothroyd III took a sniper round to the head. He landed face down onto the muddy roof with a thud.

Fifteen minutes later, Boothroyd was bandaged, smiling, smoking a cigarette and giving the “thumbs up” as he waited for the medevac helicopter, to which he walked under his own power.

It’s a “you-gotta-be-kidding-me” story that earned Boothroyd, a signals intelligence operator with 2nd Radio Battalion, a new call sign from his team members: Headshot.

That's double tough. Thank you for your service to our Corps and to our Country. Semper Fi! You sir are a bad-ass.

Heroes

2011-03-31T07:34:00.000-05:00

The radiation level within the building is 2-3 microsievert per hour. They sleep in conference rooms and hallways in the building. To shield them from radiation from the floor, they cover themselves with lead-containing sheets before they put on blankets.

That is some serious dedication to your job when you sleep under lead sheets at your FAILING NUCLEAR POWER PLANT! These guys and gals are sacrificing their lives in order to protect the country they love from nuclear contamination.

Something to think about

2011-03-30T07:31:00.000-05:00

10 Signs It's Time To Quit Your Job

Chances are if you are lucky enough to have a job, the thought of quitting sounds ridiculous. With the unemployment rate at an all time high, most people are thanking their lucky stars to be employed.

But even in a bad economy some jobs are just not worth it. Are there any telltale signs you should be looking for when trying to decide if you throw in the towel? Here are ten signs to look for to determine if it's time to find a new job:

You Never Have a Day When You Wake Up Excited To Go To Work

I scored 7 of 10. I have recently changed jobs so I am learning something new. But maybe that is just the way of the world?

My dad wanted to be a civil engineer. He was a really sharp guy. He taught himself trigonometry from a book he bought second hand. He never finished high school. In 1947, at the age of 19, my dad didn't like his jobs, so he joined the Navy. He joined mostly to get away from his parents and from working 60 hours a week and handing over his paycheck to his parents. When the Navy tested him they found out he was pretty sharp. They made him an electronic technician. And more specifically he worked on radar. At that time, radar had only been around for about 5 years.

He was an electronic technician for the rest of his life. Is it what he wanted? No. But he was good at it and I think he liked working with his friends everyday. And he was well respected in his work.

I really respect people who get up every day and go to a job they hate to put bread on their table. And I really envy people who get up everyday and go to a job they like. If scored more than 5 of 10 on this list, maybe you should find a new job now, before its too late.

Apparently some people have a problem with fake boobs

2011-03-25T08:17:00.000-05:00

A SURFERS Paradise nightclub is promoting breast enlargement surgery as a prize in a controversial lottery which has infuriated body image experts, women's groups and plastic surgeons.

Sin City Nightclub this week launched posters of well-endowed, lingerie-clad women holding a sign saying "Win a boob job worth $10,000", the Gold Coast Bulletin said.

Nightclub owner Jamie Pickering said male and female patrons at the April 3 Ibiza-themed party at the heart of the promotion would be given scratchie-style tickets that would give them either minor prizes or, if their scratchie dictated, a chance to enter the ticket in the barrel for the "boob job" draw.

However, a disclaimer on the promo poster states the prize is actually $10,000 cash, with the nightclub simply suggesting a boob job as a way to spend the windfall.

Women's Network Australia founder Lynette Palmen said the marketing ploy was aimed at the ''inflated-ego Kardashian crowd'' while a spokesman for the Department of Justice and Attorney-General said the Office of Liquor and Gaming Regulation was investigating the promotion.

So why does this promotion stand out to the Women's Network Australia? Every day some women get breast enhancement surgery. Surprisingly, every day some women get breast reduction surgery. I know! but it really happens. I know two women who have had reduction surgery.

I'm not against the work of any groups that want to promote healthy lifestyles and positive self images of women. I find confident women who are comfortable in their own skin very attractive. Evolution has played a horrible trick on women. Men choose women for looks, its a fact. If men were wired to choose women for their softball playing skills and their nursing skills I'd be married to the softball playing nurse equivalent of Helen of Troy or perhaps even Cleopatra.

You are fooling yourself if you think that we can undo hundreds of thousands of years of evolution. Making men attracted to something other than what has been wired into their brains just isn't in the ~~cards~~ genes. So the next time you see a sign promoting a boob job competition remember that you are a intelligent, sexy, confident woman and realize the contest is for the weaker of your sex who think that having big boobs is the way to a man's heart. Everyone knows that the way to man's heart is ~~through his stomach~~ turning a double play and then bandaging up the guy's leg you just tore a hole in with your cleats. If you want to hook a good man, who doesn't need a compass to know which way the wind shines, buy a glove, toss and the ball around and go to nursing school.

Infrequent sex can KILL YOU! (extreme reverb)

2011-03-24T07:00:00.000-05:00

It seems impossible to get through winter without hearing a news story about some poor guy who drops dead of a heart attack while shoveling snow. And TV dramas love the scene where the guy expires while in bed with a beauteous babe. Now it looks like both scenarios have a basis in science.

They never really say how frequently I'm supposed to have sex or exercise. There is something in there about once a week...I can live with that.

The picture shows what can happen to your feet when you wear ill fitting shoes.

Frank Neuhauser, the first spelling bee champ, dead, 97

2011-03-23T07:32:00.000-05:00

WASHINGTON — Frank Neuhauser, who in 1925 won the first U.S. national spelling bee with the word "gladiolus," has died. He was 97.

Neuhauser was a patent lawyer who lived in Silver Spring, Maryland. He died March 11 in his home, Francis J. Collins Funeral Home has verified. He had myelodysplastic syndrome, a blood disease, The Washington Post reported.

He was 11 years old when he won the championship. His prizes included $500 in gold and a trip to the White House to meet President Calvin Coolidge.

500$ in gold. SWEEEEET. It was probably in coin form. Twenty-five 20$ gold pieces. I wonder if that money helped that family through the depression?

I caught this story with a typo that they have since corrected. How do you miss that?

Talk about Winning

2011-03-23T07:24:00.000-05:00

SAN DIEGO -- San Diego lifeguards Tuesday rescued a young woman who apparently became stranded on a cliff above Black's Beach without her clothes.

Dozens of lifeguards and Fire Engine Company 9 were sent to the Glider Port at about 2:15 p.m., according to San Diego Fire and Rescue Department spokesman Maurice Luque.

DOZENS!!! Dozen's of life guards, probably 8 news helicopters, 2 companies of fire fighters as well. I'll bet there were a dozen more pissed off they didn't roll for that.

Irony, defined Rhode Island style

2011-03-22T07:00:00.001-05:00

PROVIDENCE, R.I. -- The two men charged in Friday's double shooting outside the Institute for the Study and Practice of Nonviolence have been involved in gunfire in South Providence before -- one as a victim and the other as a shooter, according to the police.

You are doing it WRONG. Irony is seldom as ironic as this.

Meet the 2011 Hide-n-Seek World Champion

2011-03-21T15:45:00.000-05:00

STOUTLAND, Mo. -- After almost 12 hours, searchers found 4-year-old Bryce McCraken on Sunday night. The Camden County sheriff says the boy will be checked out but appears to be okay.

Bryce disappeared on Sunday afternoon while playing hide-and-seek with some other kids. More than 250 volunteers and first responders united to walk the woods near the family's home outside Stoutland to search for the boy.

Enjoy the crown little buddy.

St. Patrick's Day

2011-03-17T08:02:00.000-05:00

Today is the day everyone is Irish and drinks themselves stupid. I know because I've been that person. They closed down my favorite Irish Pub, O'Connell's of Norman. Wait one, that isn't entirely true, they moved it to Campus Corner and bulldozed the old building to build student housing. None-the-less it's gone.

The Campus Corner location will probably never have the heart the old place had. Over the years I've drank many a green beer at O'Connell's. I've drank beer and eaten green eggs and ham at 7am and then gone on to class and in the afternoon, after a nap, gone back for more. I've taken the day off from work to drink beer all day. I've had my time swimming in the green beer.

It's no matter my new favorite Irish Pub is McNellie's. They have two locations, one near work and one near home, how could that be any better?

These days I am annoyed at all the drunk kids hitting on each other and being loud. My conscience will not allow me to drink and drive so I will probably have to just go home and have a beer. I will stop by the liquor store and get some Boddington's to enjoy. (Yeah I know it's not Irish beer) The very fact that St. Patrick's day falls on a week day prevents me from being properly inebriated.

And you know what...I'm not a single ounce Irish. I was however adopted into a very Irish family of NON-DRINKERS. That's right...there are Irish people out there who don't enjoy the odd beer, let alone any whiskey. This generational setback has not deterred my cousin who is blood kin of these Irish. She is a proper Irish maid and enjoys her beer and whiskey as much as any Faux-Irish person you will ever meet.

She's Irish and may God have pity on ya if you cast dispersions on her race this week.
So without a single drop of Irish blood and knowing only one phrase in Gaelic,

Talmid ag dul an Tula's

(rally on Tula's)

The motto of the 10th Kansas Company "A" Reenacting group

I wish my dear cousin a Happy St.Patrick's Day.

Victoria,
May the ground rise up to meet your feet and that your face shall not touch the earth until your last day.
May all your clovers be genetic mutations and have 4 leaves.
May the little people brush your hair at night and guard you in your slumber.
May all the whiskey you drink tonight make you wiser than the Druid priests.
May each beer you drink kiss your lips hard and your liver gently.
Rally on Victoria you good son's of Ireland for her heart is strong and her will untestable.
Éirinn go Brách to each of you and watch over your Irish sister as your own for all your days.
Happy St. Patrick's Day cuz.

Ummm, No Rick Rolling in Indiana

2011-03-15T09:32:00.000-05:00

FORT WAYNE, Ind. -- A new government building in Fort Wayne, Ind., may officially be called Citizens Square, but to some not-so-square citizens it will always be the Harry Baals Government Center.

Fort Wayne Mayor Tom Henry announced the new city and county government center's name Monday.

The most popular choice for the building in an online poll was the "Harry Baals Government Center." The second-place finisher was "Thunder Dome."

For those of you not familiar with the Rick Rolling term click here (Wikipedia). (that would have been easy for me to Rick Roll you right there but I didn't.

Harry was a probably a family name. I would have to say that parents that name their children with such a double entendres today need to have their parental rights revoked. That is just mean and not funny.

Thunder Dome? "Two men enter, one man leave!" "Bust a deal, spin the wheel." These rules might work in small city politics. I know they would in my home town of Norman, Oklahoma.

This is what happens when you allow the mob to rule.

Stormtroopers! FTW!

2011-03-11T14:29:00.000-06:00

he Ballistic Protective Maxillofacial Shield, made by Gentex Corporation, is a piece of personal protective equipment made to shield a Marine’s face from shrapnel and other ballistic threats faced on today’s battlefield.

WTH?

I was originally issued a M1 helmet when I joined the Marines in 1982. We liked them because they were utilitarian. You could boil water in one, it served as a bucket, a seat and had a very high cool factor. Hell, these were the same helmets the Devil Dogs of World War 2, Korea, and Vietnam all wore. My first complaint with the "new helmets" in 1984 was, "How the hell am I supposed to hear anything behind me with this thing on?" They seriously hindered sound from behind you. You couldn't boil water in them either.

This looks like it just compounds that concern and adds to it, "How the hell am I supposed to communicate with my fellow Marines with this thing on?"

I guess if they install helmet to helmet communication systems it would all work for the communication aspect, but there is no way you are hearing anything of the ambient environment sounds around you with that helmet on.

I can give the designers props for trying to design armor for our fighting men. If these save lives I'm all for it. I'd love to hear the murmuring of the troops when they are issued these. I bet it sounds a lot like our murmuring of 1984.

Have we seen this before?

Yep.

I think all would be forgiven if they start issuing blasters.

Fark Headline: Sailor fighting U.S. Navy discharge after getting caught in bed with another male sailor says he's not gay -- they just fell asleep watching "The Vampire Diaries." Dude, you need to stop talking

2011-03-09T07:00:00.002-06:00

To hear Navy Petty Officer Stephen C. Jones tell it, what happened in his bedroom one night last month was purely innocuous: Another male sailor came by to watch "The Vampire Diaries," and they both dozed off in the same bed. "That is the honest, entire story," Jones said.
But the Navy doesn't think so...

He has a few things going against him on this one.

Vampire Diaries
Same Bed
230 Years of U.S. Naval History

Yeah I just went there...that just happened...Oooorah!

In actuality I hope they give him a fair trial. Dereliction of Duty is a serious charge. He joined to serve his country, that is first and foremost. If he is unfit to serve it, then that is a whole other question.

Once again Rule 34

2011-03-08T07:00:00.000-06:00

Frog's porn found on magistrate's laptop

A MAGISTRATE has narrowly avoided jail after being caught with a collection of extreme pornography — including images of women having sex with a gerbil and a FROG.

Michael Hall, 46 — who is also a school governor and worked on a council panel to protect children — downloaded the disgusting images on to his laptop computer.

When police raided his home they found 230 photos and 150 videos showing women engaging in sex acts with horses, a donkey, dogs, a gerbil, a frog and a live snake.

Chick and frogs make him randy? That's one seriously sick person.

My favorite part...the picture...they pix-elated the frog's face to protect his anonymity. LMAO!

Doing my part to stay healthy

2011-03-07T07:00:00.002-06:00

News: It's Healthy To Stare At Women's Chests - Watch more Break.com

Techno Viking (Captioned)

2011-03-01T07:00:00.000-06:00

I've shared the ~~genius~~ ~~magic~~ brilliance of Techno-Viking before. This video was originally posted to YouTube on September 30th, 2007. The cult of Techno-Viking only gets stronger. Enjoy.

Men Staring at Goats: Part Duex

2011-02-28T07:57:00.000-06:00

Sens. John McCain, R-Ariz., and Joe Lieberman, I-Conn., who've been traveling in the Middle East for the past week, joked Sunday about a Rolling Stone article released last week that alleged that three-star Gen. William Caldwell ordered his staff to use military techniques to persuade them to back more money for training Afghan forces.

"Actually, I'm sure they succeeded with Senator Lieberman. There's no doubt about that," McCain laughed before adding that he and Lieberman supported the effort in Afghanistan all along.

"It's a weird story, honestly," added Lieberman.

You first read about this story in my post Men Staring at Goats? I think its funny that the two men can joke about something so silly. So how about we NOT have expensive congressional hearings about this crap and get on with crafting a budget and a recovery for our country?

Frank Buckles, Last living US WWI vet dies, 110

2011-02-28T07:39:00.000-06:00

He was repeatedly rejected by military recruiters and got into uniform at 16 after lying about his age. But Frank Buckles would later become the last surviving U.S. veteran of World War I.

Buckles, who also survived being a civilian POW in the Philippines in World War II, died of natural causes Sunday at his home in Charles Town, biographer and family spokesman David DeJonge said in a statement. He was 110.

Born in Missouri in 1901 and raised in Oklahoma, Buckles visited a string of military recruiters after the United States entered the "war to end all wars" in April 1917. He was repeatedly rejected before convincing an Army captain he was 18. He was actually 16 1/2.

In spring 2007, Buckles told the AP of the trouble he went through to get into the military.

"I went to the state fair up in Wichita, Kansas, and while there, went to the recruiting station for the Marine Corps," he said. "The nice Marine sergeant said I was too young when I gave my age as 18, said I had to be 21."

Buckles returned a week later.

"I went back to the recruiting sergeant, and this time I was 21," he said with a grin. "I passed the inspection ... but he told me I just wasn't heavy enough."

Then he tried the Navy, whose recruiter told Buckles he was flat-footed.

Buckles wouldn't quit. In Oklahoma City, an Army captain demanded a birth certificate.

"I told him birth certificates were not made in Missouri when I was born, that the record was in a family Bible. I said, 'You don't want me to bring the family Bible down, do you?'" Buckles said with a laugh. "He said, 'OK, we'll take you.'"

He enlisted Aug. 14, 1917, serial number 15577.

"Didn't I make every effort?"

Yes sir you did. Thank you for serving. I'm sorry we squandered your service in the Great War. We learned nothing of World War 1 and the loss of 16 million people. We would allow the rise of several total despots just 16 years later that would cost the world 60 million people's lives.

I haven't forgot. Rest easy.