Saturday, September 10, 2011

Boomer Sooner

Its really nice to get the recognition....

...but some where deep inside me, I'd rather we weren't so prominently displayed.

Go Sooners. 
The Sooners are off today. They'll be back on the field next week with a tough match-up against Florida State.

Friday, September 9, 2011

No Geo-Caching in Newcastle, Oklahoma

Newcastle first responders enjoyed a wild-goose-chase-turned-treasure-hunt last Wednesday when a bomb scare turned out to be merely an Internet hobby enjoyed by millions around the world.

According to the police report, Newcastle Police responded to 305 Riley Road, located just north of the Newcastle All Sports Association's youth baseball and softball fields on SH-130. Roberto Estuardo Deloera called the supposed bomb into police after spotting it while cutting trees on the neighboring property. Deloera described the device as a round PVC pipe covered with camouflage duct tape hanging on a tree on the far north end of 3009 SH-130, the report said.

The story continues... Dianna Lynn Brown of Norman who was previous observed near the natural gas pumping station looking for a geo-cache took authorities to the next device, which was booked as evidence along with the other devices found that day. No charges were filed in the case, but Norman said any devices found by Newcastle police would be apprehended for the consideration of public safety. "We will be picking up these type of devices to eliminate the chance that anyone might come upon them and believe them to be a bomb."

My hometown just put a stop to Geo-Caching. This type of ignorance is why I moved out of the town 25 years ago. The police would do better to learn a thing or two about how "internet games" are played. Why would anyone want to blow up a tree in the middle of a field? Common-sense is nearly non-existent on both sides of this issue. I will admit, placing a geo-cache on private property that just so happened to be a natural gas pumping station is pretty stupid. Welcome to small town America.

Thursday, September 8, 2011

Well played sir, well played

Nazis, needlework and my dad By Patrick Barkham. Not many men belong to a stitching group, but Tony Casdagli picked up his enthusiasm for the craft from his father, who kept himself sane by fashioning subversive messages as a PoW during World War II.

After six months held by the Nazis in a prisoner of war camp, Major Alexis Casdagli was handed a piece of canvas by a fellow inmate. Pinching red and blue thread from a disintegrating pullover belonging to an elderly Cretan general, Casdagli passed the long hours in captivity by painstakingly creating a sampler in cross-stitch. Around decorative swastikas and a banal inscription saying he completed his work in December 1941, the British officer stitched a border of irregular dots and dashes. Over the next four years his work was displayed at the four camps in Germany where he was imprisoned, and his Nazi captors never once deciphered the messages threaded in Morse code: "God Save the King" and "Fuck Hitler".

Well done sir. Another fine example of our Greatest Generation.

Seriously poor editing

I had to comment on this article and how poorly it was written. I'm sure an editor will correct it at any moment, so I screen capped it for you. This is the kind of poor writing and even worse editing that makes me wonder why I never attempted to be a news reporter. I can write betterer than this. No seriously, I can write more betterer seriously than writer can.
Link to story here.
Now on to the commentary....
This story is the reason Florida has it's own tag on FARK.COM.
Where do I start? First, I get it. You are working in a convenience store, arming yourself is probably a good idea. I'd be armed, and DISPLAY the weapon prominently on my hip, along with my shooting trophies and my marksmanship certificates. I'd probably even get a picture of me hanging out with the district attorney AT THE RANGE, HOLDING OUR GUNS for display in my store. I don't know this woman but she should seriously take ANOTHER course or two in gun safety.
Secondly, That was pretty decent of the boss to drive her to the hospital, I mean, it was the least she could do right? I think I would leverage my boss to buy my weapon and training courses. That way I could carry a gun, get it out and "show it to her" someday.
In actuality these ladies are probably best friends and will later this week pop a few of the shootee's pain pills and drink a few beers and have a few laughs about the incident. I can just hear the manager, "Remember that time I shot you, and you were like, 'owwww' and like 'OMG!' and like 'you bitch! you just shot me!' Good times, good times."

Tuesday, September 6, 2011

He finally caved

Shannon Tweed finally put her foot down after being "unmarried" to KISS frontman Gene Simmons for almost three decades. And so, after a televised tiff on "The Joy Behar Show" and a brief break-up when Shannon moved out, the rock star and his former Playmate have reunited and are officially tying the knot. 

When I learned that Gene had landed Shannon I thought, "lucky bastard, it'll never last". Well I was wrong, it lasted....30 years! But it lasted in part because Gene would never marry Shannon. And if you've ever watched their show, its a major sore spot for her. I guess the sore has festered a bit lately and Gene has decided to "go pro" as Tom Hank's character Rick Gassko so aptly put it in the 1984 movie Bachelor Party. (no I couldn't find a clip) So here's to Shannon and Gene. May your married years be as awesome as your unmarried years have been. Cheers.

Monday, September 5, 2011

Holy CRAP!

MANILA, Philippines -- Villagers and veteran hunters have captured a one-ton saltwater crocodile which they plan to make the star of a planned ecotourism park in a southern Philippine town, an official said Monday. Mayor Edwin Cox Elorde said dozens of villagers and experts ensnared the 21-foot male crocodile along a creek in Bunawan township in Agusan del Sur province after a three-week hunt. It could be one of the largest crocodiles to be captured alive in recent years, he said, quoting local crocodile experts.

Holy crap that's a big crocodile. I wonder how old it is estimated to be? My friend lives in Florida and they had an alligator living in the community lake. It had a nasty habit of snatching small dogs from the shore. Well he snatched the wrong lady's dog and she had the city exterminate him. He was 7 foot long and was estimated at 100 years old. A lot of the residents were pretty upset with the extermination. Quoting one of the neighbors, "he's been swimming around for a hundred years. 

People should know better than to walk their dogs near the lake shore. He's been here at longer than any of us will ever be." I for one have a list of rules. Actually guidelines really but I've lived this long abiding by them and it's served me well. 

  1. Shoot first, ask questions of the survivors if you didn't place your bullets correctly. 
  2. Never play cards with anyone who's name has the name of a city in it. New York Tony, Big Chicago Lou, etc...
  3. Don't date chicks with dagger tattoos. 
  4. Never live anywhere that I am not the top consumer on the food chain.
  5. When you are about to get stuck, merge on to the interstate, drive it like you stole it.
So you see living in Florida might violate this Devil Dog's rule number four. I've seen the big alligators while on the swamp boat tours. No thank you. They have way too many laws protecting these nasty bastards to suit me. But I see the point of the protections at the same time. They would be all but extinct if you didn't protect them. With all the protection they are being found all the way up into Oklahoma now. I'm pretty sure our nasty winters will keep them at bay.

Sunday, September 4, 2011

Former Bucs and Oklahoma Sooner DE Lee Roy Selmon dies

TAMPA, Fla. -- Lee Roy Selmon, the first player ever drafted by the Tampa Bay Buccaneers, died Sunday, according to a statement from his family that was released by St. Joseph's Hospital. Selmon was 56. "It is with very heavy hearts that the Selmon family announces the passing of our beloved husband, father and brother, Lee Roy Selmon," the statement said. "Lee Roy passed away today surrounded by family and friends at St. Joseph's Hospital.

The Sooner Nation looses another great. The State of Oklahoma looses another icon.